...And empty my pantry.
A few years back, some high school kids decided they would try to fill the FargoDome with non-perishable goods for families in need. It has escalated into a GREAT donation drive that all area schools participate in.
When you have a child in elementary school, this means you are more than likely donating 25% of your pantry throughout the week as they try to load their backpacks up as heavy as possible for their classroom competition.
Add another child in elementary school, and I'm forking over like 45% of my pantry! Now, I like to give as much as the next guy, I really do. I feel good about it* and I know that the boys think it's a great idea.
But do they really GET it? Do they realize that there are some kids out there that can't just open the pantry door and grab a rice krispie treat? Can't just fill a bowl with their favorite cereal and walk away? They see bare shelves. I don't know that they GET that part of this food drive.
I think the next step is to take them to help actually HAND OUT those donated goodies to a family in need. Or get them in with the United Way and start filling backpacks with food for kids to take home for the weekend. SOMETHING to get them to see that not everyone can just go scrounge in the kitchen and find something to snack on. 87 times a day. It's true, they eat a lot. My grocery bill is only going to get more and more out of hand. And that's OUTSIDE of this food drive. :)
*I'd like to add that I do feel bad when I'm selecting food out of the pantry for them to take - because I will make sure not to give the last of something away because really, that just means I'd have to add it to the grocery list and ugh, too much time. Man, that sounded snotty. I will also be sure to pick things that I know the boys don't enjoy the most. But OTHERS may really LIKE that food, right!??!?! Hmm, I don't feel quite so charitable now that I wrote that out. Oops.
Showing posts with label guilt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label guilt. Show all posts
Friday, November 18, 2011
Friday, August 5, 2011
I fought the law and ... I won
Well, maybe I shouldn't say that I fought the LAW per se, but more like a determined Target employee.
I'm about to reveal something that I don't believe I have ever shared with anyone. Not even DH knows this one. Ok, so I may have told a friend after a few Morgan Diets, but I don't recall and so I'm going to say that IF that has happened, it doesn't count. :)
So in the summer before 8th grade, I was at the mall with my mom and sister. We had a set time to meet and I was wandering somewhat aimlessly - at Dayton's or JC Penney's eyeing the Guess? and Girbaud jeans that I knew my mom would not spring for. I finally started through Target (which at that time was attached to the mall in Grand Forks). I had no money. I had no ambition. Maybe I wanted to feel pretty, I don't know. All I know is that somehow, I ended up with a compact of compressed powder in my hands and a pounding heart as I eluded capture.
I guess I should clarify. Or maybe you figured it out. You are a smartie after all.
I got it in my head that if I took it OUT of its packaging, no alarms would go off and it'd be easy to pass off as if I had carried it INTO the store with me. But I didn't. Oh no, I sure didn't. And seriously, my heart is pounding now even admitting this! 20 years have passed and I still am nervous to say it out loud!
Enter one determined Target employee. I was in some of the clothing racks and kind of had my hands in where the clothes touched each other - very hard to see. But I guess he saw. I don't know what, maybe it was the guilty face. Or the fact that the packaging I removed had fallen to the ground. I don't know. All I know is that he gave me a look. And I freaked.
Enter my stealth evading of capture. I walked calmly, if quickly. Weaving in and out of clothing racks, areas of the store and I did catch sight of him a couple of times. Until at last. I passed through to the promised land - the courtyard of the mall. Out of Target. No alarms. No bells. No whistles. No employee chasing me out of the store. I totally won.
And I am SOOOO happy that Target is no longer attached to the mall in Grand Forks. I can shop in peace when I'm in town there. No worries that the dedicated Target employee will recognize me and chase me down now! Muah ah ah ah.
The guilt. All for what - $4.59 Covergirl makeup? Such is the life.
I'm about to reveal something that I don't believe I have ever shared with anyone. Not even DH knows this one. Ok, so I may have told a friend after a few Morgan Diets, but I don't recall and so I'm going to say that IF that has happened, it doesn't count. :)
So in the summer before 8th grade, I was at the mall with my mom and sister. We had a set time to meet and I was wandering somewhat aimlessly - at Dayton's or JC Penney's eyeing the Guess? and Girbaud jeans that I knew my mom would not spring for. I finally started through Target (which at that time was attached to the mall in Grand Forks). I had no money. I had no ambition. Maybe I wanted to feel pretty, I don't know. All I know is that somehow, I ended up with a compact of compressed powder in my hands and a pounding heart as I eluded capture.
I guess I should clarify. Or maybe you figured it out. You are a smartie after all.
I got it in my head that if I took it OUT of its packaging, no alarms would go off and it'd be easy to pass off as if I had carried it INTO the store with me. But I didn't. Oh no, I sure didn't. And seriously, my heart is pounding now even admitting this! 20 years have passed and I still am nervous to say it out loud!
Enter one determined Target employee. I was in some of the clothing racks and kind of had my hands in where the clothes touched each other - very hard to see. But I guess he saw. I don't know what, maybe it was the guilty face. Or the fact that the packaging I removed had fallen to the ground. I don't know. All I know is that he gave me a look. And I freaked.
Enter my stealth evading of capture. I walked calmly, if quickly. Weaving in and out of clothing racks, areas of the store and I did catch sight of him a couple of times. Until at last. I passed through to the promised land - the courtyard of the mall. Out of Target. No alarms. No bells. No whistles. No employee chasing me out of the store. I totally won.
And I am SOOOO happy that Target is no longer attached to the mall in Grand Forks. I can shop in peace when I'm in town there. No worries that the dedicated Target employee will recognize me and chase me down now! Muah ah ah ah.
The guilt. All for what - $4.59 Covergirl makeup? Such is the life.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Traditional Roles
I struggle with my feelings about the "traditional" roles that we all fall into. I want to think I'm progressive, I've grown up with great role models and strong women to look up to. But, I still feel myself falling into the "mom guilt" area beyond just wanting to make sure everyone is happy and healthy.
How is it that I have turned into someone who needs to hear appreciation for meals? I sit and hold my breath while the DH and kids try it out until I hear the sounds of enjoyment. WTH? On the one hand, I feel that I should make something and they should eat it and everything is fine. But on the other hand....I need that feedback. And it kills me when DH says "it's fine" - I need more than fine. I need to hear if I should make it again, if it needs something more, if it's too spicy or too bland. BUT if he is too critical, I can't help but feel bad. UGH! For the most part, he's just happy to sit and eat in peace.
This worry extends beyond the kitchen. Am I the only mom who feels guilty when DH gives the boys their baths? I should ENJOY the fact that he will do it, instead of feeling guilty that he's doing it while I am tending to other things in the house.
Sometimes, I feel that I need to know TOO much information about what happens when I'm not here. If I happen to go to happy hour or wine club, when I get home, I drill DH about what the boys had for supper, if they were in good moods, how and when did they go to bed. Sure, I love to hear the cute funny stories too but I want details about how the night went. Why? Why can't I just trust that they were fed, happy and healthy and peacefully sleeping? I never question DH's parenting ability, but I *need* those details. I can tell that it irritates him but he still will indulge me and tell me. Sometimes I don't get enough details but I try to let it go.
Even with how households have advanced I think that a lot of moms still feel the need to take care of the household, while the husband goes out to work and brings home the bacon. How do you balance it out when you're ALSO going to work and bringing home that same bacon??
I've tried to get over the feeling that I've got to do it all and know it all. Do you know how hard it is to ask DH to make a dentist appointment for one of the boys? He has no problem doing it, but he needs to be asked. It doesn't register with him to just take care of it. So then in my mind, why don't I just take care of it myself?
I should just relax, lay off the worrying and enjoy my family and house. I should let DH do his thing and appreciate how awesomely we work together. I realize this. I do. But it's so easy to fall into the guilt. Grr.
How is it that I have turned into someone who needs to hear appreciation for meals? I sit and hold my breath while the DH and kids try it out until I hear the sounds of enjoyment. WTH? On the one hand, I feel that I should make something and they should eat it and everything is fine. But on the other hand....I need that feedback. And it kills me when DH says "it's fine" - I need more than fine. I need to hear if I should make it again, if it needs something more, if it's too spicy or too bland. BUT if he is too critical, I can't help but feel bad. UGH! For the most part, he's just happy to sit and eat in peace.
This worry extends beyond the kitchen. Am I the only mom who feels guilty when DH gives the boys their baths? I should ENJOY the fact that he will do it, instead of feeling guilty that he's doing it while I am tending to other things in the house.
Sometimes, I feel that I need to know TOO much information about what happens when I'm not here. If I happen to go to happy hour or wine club, when I get home, I drill DH about what the boys had for supper, if they were in good moods, how and when did they go to bed. Sure, I love to hear the cute funny stories too but I want details about how the night went. Why? Why can't I just trust that they were fed, happy and healthy and peacefully sleeping? I never question DH's parenting ability, but I *need* those details. I can tell that it irritates him but he still will indulge me and tell me. Sometimes I don't get enough details but I try to let it go.
Even with how households have advanced I think that a lot of moms still feel the need to take care of the household, while the husband goes out to work and brings home the bacon. How do you balance it out when you're ALSO going to work and bringing home that same bacon??
I've tried to get over the feeling that I've got to do it all and know it all. Do you know how hard it is to ask DH to make a dentist appointment for one of the boys? He has no problem doing it, but he needs to be asked. It doesn't register with him to just take care of it. So then in my mind, why don't I just take care of it myself?
I should just relax, lay off the worrying and enjoy my family and house. I should let DH do his thing and appreciate how awesomely we work together. I realize this. I do. But it's so easy to fall into the guilt. Grr.
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