Yes, I'm writing tonight about it being time to go back to school. Yes, I know that everyone and their DOG for pete's sake have written about this if they have a child who will be going to school or if they once smelled a child who was walking by on their way to school. Whatever, don't judge.
So anyway. Two years ago, our oldest went to Kindergarten. We went to a back-to-school night about a week before school started that was specifically for kindergarteners. It was great. They met the teachers, unpacked their stuff, learned where the bathrooms and gym and lunch room were. It was all very organized and orderly and put this first time momma at ease.
Now, back-to-school night is with all kids - Pre-K through Seniors. It's a madhouse. Not much organization when you're walking around. Sure, we got their stuff put away and met their teachers (2nd Grade and Kindergarten) and the water fountains and whatnot. But I still feel so disorganized. Like, did I tell the teachers that the boys are riding the bus home instead of to the after-school program? Did I mention to J-Bird's teacher that he just got his glasses earlier this week and we need to be watching him a little closer to make sure he gets used to them? Did I tell T-Dogg's teacher that he just had his adenoids out and has been having a sore neck?
No, I don't know that I told them any of that. I can't guarantee that I sent my two oldest boys to school with all the prep that I could do for them and with them. And I agonized all day.
Did they make it home on the right bus? Yep. Did J-Bird lose/break/mangle his glasses? Nope. Were they worn out and ready for an early bedtime tonight? Damn straight. Ah, my work here is done. :)
Only to do over again and again for the next how many years???
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Monday, August 22, 2011
Oh my.
The other night, J-bird gives me a hug and then asks if he touched my privates. Um, no, no you did not.
"But isn't your wiener right there?" he asked.
"No, mommy doesn't have a wiener."
"Are you kidding me? Are you joking with me? How do you pee?"
So T-Dogg pipes up from the table with, "girls use their butts."
Ah, yes, the old pee out your butt trick. It's a fan favorite, I'm sure. As the only girl in a house with 4 boys in it, I think I deserve to have three locks on the bathroom door. Just to be safe. Sigh.
All this while DH sits at the table doing homework. His shoulders were shaking but he wouldn't look up and help me out. Bastard.
"But isn't your wiener right there?" he asked.
"No, mommy doesn't have a wiener."
"Are you kidding me? Are you joking with me? How do you pee?"
So T-Dogg pipes up from the table with, "girls use their butts."
Ah, yes, the old pee out your butt trick. It's a fan favorite, I'm sure. As the only girl in a house with 4 boys in it, I think I deserve to have three locks on the bathroom door. Just to be safe. Sigh.
All this while DH sits at the table doing homework. His shoulders were shaking but he wouldn't look up and help me out. Bastard.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
I don't get it.
So a few weeks ago, I was leaving a meeting and heading back to my office. I was driving through an alley and stopped where it met the street, where there was quite a line-up of vehicles waiting for the traffic light to change.
Directly in front of me was some sort of SUV, it was red but I couldn't tell you what kind, because I'm a girl. In the backseat, which was level with my eyes, was a little boy. He was probably 2 years old, 3 at most. The window was down and he was wearing the cutest little sunglasses and was singing along with some song on the radio. I couldn't hear him, but I could see his mouth just going.
I smiled at him and he smiled back at me. I wiggled my fingers and he wiggled back at me. And then...even though the light hadn't changed yet, his mom inches the SUV forward and his window slowly raises until it's closed.
Um really? Am I some scary chick? I've got three boys of my own - and I don't mind when people make goofy faces at them and make them laugh. Sometimes I am a little leery when we're out in the open or in a store and someone comes right up to them and gets in our space. But to be completely safe, in your own car, all buckled and feel the need to cut off the interaction? It's not like I parked, got out of my Yukon and walked up to his window. No, I stayed in my vehicle, all my windows up, just waiting my turn to get onto the street.
Do we really have reason to be THAT nervous? Ok, I mean, I work in FARGO for pete's sake. I was just so surprised and I'm sure I made a face like - REALLY???
Trust me, I can be a mama bear too but I just thought that was overboard. What do you think? Sure, maybe they have had some bad experiences but wow. I'm still floored.
Directly in front of me was some sort of SUV, it was red but I couldn't tell you what kind, because I'm a girl. In the backseat, which was level with my eyes, was a little boy. He was probably 2 years old, 3 at most. The window was down and he was wearing the cutest little sunglasses and was singing along with some song on the radio. I couldn't hear him, but I could see his mouth just going.
I smiled at him and he smiled back at me. I wiggled my fingers and he wiggled back at me. And then...even though the light hadn't changed yet, his mom inches the SUV forward and his window slowly raises until it's closed.
Um really? Am I some scary chick? I've got three boys of my own - and I don't mind when people make goofy faces at them and make them laugh. Sometimes I am a little leery when we're out in the open or in a store and someone comes right up to them and gets in our space. But to be completely safe, in your own car, all buckled and feel the need to cut off the interaction? It's not like I parked, got out of my Yukon and walked up to his window. No, I stayed in my vehicle, all my windows up, just waiting my turn to get onto the street.
Do we really have reason to be THAT nervous? Ok, I mean, I work in FARGO for pete's sake. I was just so surprised and I'm sure I made a face like - REALLY???
Trust me, I can be a mama bear too but I just thought that was overboard. What do you think? Sure, maybe they have had some bad experiences but wow. I'm still floored.
Friday, August 5, 2011
I fought the law and ... I won
Well, maybe I shouldn't say that I fought the LAW per se, but more like a determined Target employee.
I'm about to reveal something that I don't believe I have ever shared with anyone. Not even DH knows this one. Ok, so I may have told a friend after a few Morgan Diets, but I don't recall and so I'm going to say that IF that has happened, it doesn't count. :)
So in the summer before 8th grade, I was at the mall with my mom and sister. We had a set time to meet and I was wandering somewhat aimlessly - at Dayton's or JC Penney's eyeing the Guess? and Girbaud jeans that I knew my mom would not spring for. I finally started through Target (which at that time was attached to the mall in Grand Forks). I had no money. I had no ambition. Maybe I wanted to feel pretty, I don't know. All I know is that somehow, I ended up with a compact of compressed powder in my hands and a pounding heart as I eluded capture.
I guess I should clarify. Or maybe you figured it out. You are a smartie after all.
I got it in my head that if I took it OUT of its packaging, no alarms would go off and it'd be easy to pass off as if I had carried it INTO the store with me. But I didn't. Oh no, I sure didn't. And seriously, my heart is pounding now even admitting this! 20 years have passed and I still am nervous to say it out loud!
Enter one determined Target employee. I was in some of the clothing racks and kind of had my hands in where the clothes touched each other - very hard to see. But I guess he saw. I don't know what, maybe it was the guilty face. Or the fact that the packaging I removed had fallen to the ground. I don't know. All I know is that he gave me a look. And I freaked.
Enter my stealth evading of capture. I walked calmly, if quickly. Weaving in and out of clothing racks, areas of the store and I did catch sight of him a couple of times. Until at last. I passed through to the promised land - the courtyard of the mall. Out of Target. No alarms. No bells. No whistles. No employee chasing me out of the store. I totally won.
And I am SOOOO happy that Target is no longer attached to the mall in Grand Forks. I can shop in peace when I'm in town there. No worries that the dedicated Target employee will recognize me and chase me down now! Muah ah ah ah.
The guilt. All for what - $4.59 Covergirl makeup? Such is the life.
I'm about to reveal something that I don't believe I have ever shared with anyone. Not even DH knows this one. Ok, so I may have told a friend after a few Morgan Diets, but I don't recall and so I'm going to say that IF that has happened, it doesn't count. :)
So in the summer before 8th grade, I was at the mall with my mom and sister. We had a set time to meet and I was wandering somewhat aimlessly - at Dayton's or JC Penney's eyeing the Guess? and Girbaud jeans that I knew my mom would not spring for. I finally started through Target (which at that time was attached to the mall in Grand Forks). I had no money. I had no ambition. Maybe I wanted to feel pretty, I don't know. All I know is that somehow, I ended up with a compact of compressed powder in my hands and a pounding heart as I eluded capture.
I guess I should clarify. Or maybe you figured it out. You are a smartie after all.
I got it in my head that if I took it OUT of its packaging, no alarms would go off and it'd be easy to pass off as if I had carried it INTO the store with me. But I didn't. Oh no, I sure didn't. And seriously, my heart is pounding now even admitting this! 20 years have passed and I still am nervous to say it out loud!
Enter one determined Target employee. I was in some of the clothing racks and kind of had my hands in where the clothes touched each other - very hard to see. But I guess he saw. I don't know what, maybe it was the guilty face. Or the fact that the packaging I removed had fallen to the ground. I don't know. All I know is that he gave me a look. And I freaked.
Enter my stealth evading of capture. I walked calmly, if quickly. Weaving in and out of clothing racks, areas of the store and I did catch sight of him a couple of times. Until at last. I passed through to the promised land - the courtyard of the mall. Out of Target. No alarms. No bells. No whistles. No employee chasing me out of the store. I totally won.
And I am SOOOO happy that Target is no longer attached to the mall in Grand Forks. I can shop in peace when I'm in town there. No worries that the dedicated Target employee will recognize me and chase me down now! Muah ah ah ah.
The guilt. All for what - $4.59 Covergirl makeup? Such is the life.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Hug it Out
How do you know when someone is a hugger or not? Do you hug anyway? Is there a hugging etiquette out there?
I'm a hugger. I love to hug. I like to hug hello, goodbye, sorry to hear about that, yay for you and yours, etc. Any occasion is a good time for a hug.
BUT there is always a little voice in my head that questions whether or not the recipient is happy to get hugged or not. If you're hugging good-bye, do you have to hug EVERYONE or just a select few? And how long is too long? There's always that almost imperceptible shift when either the hugger or the huggee decide that it's been long enough and try to extricate themselves from the embrace.
We had friends in Denver who were actually kissers. Like smack dab on the mouth when they saw you. They were from NYC, so maybe that's the way things are done out there, ehhh?? (Imagine Buddy Valastro saying that with an East Coast accent - not so much the Fonz).
I have a friend who is most definitely NOT a hugger. She looks completely uncomfortable when you make the move to hug her and just kind of gives you a pat on the back as she's searching for the exits with her eyes. I've got other friends who hold on for dear life and you're considering gnawing off their arms to get them to let go.
My boys love hugs. And I am taking advantage of it while I still can. I know that eventually they will stop running for hugs from mom. But for now...I will hug on them as much as possible! Gotta get my fix somehow! (J-bird ran up to me tonight for a quick hug after he hadn't seen me for a couple hours and I couldn't stop thinking about how sweet it was. Had to write a post). :)
I'm a hugger. I love to hug. I like to hug hello, goodbye, sorry to hear about that, yay for you and yours, etc. Any occasion is a good time for a hug.
BUT there is always a little voice in my head that questions whether or not the recipient is happy to get hugged or not. If you're hugging good-bye, do you have to hug EVERYONE or just a select few? And how long is too long? There's always that almost imperceptible shift when either the hugger or the huggee decide that it's been long enough and try to extricate themselves from the embrace.
We had friends in Denver who were actually kissers. Like smack dab on the mouth when they saw you. They were from NYC, so maybe that's the way things are done out there, ehhh?? (Imagine Buddy Valastro saying that with an East Coast accent - not so much the Fonz).
I have a friend who is most definitely NOT a hugger. She looks completely uncomfortable when you make the move to hug her and just kind of gives you a pat on the back as she's searching for the exits with her eyes. I've got other friends who hold on for dear life and you're considering gnawing off their arms to get them to let go.
My boys love hugs. And I am taking advantage of it while I still can. I know that eventually they will stop running for hugs from mom. But for now...I will hug on them as much as possible! Gotta get my fix somehow! (J-bird ran up to me tonight for a quick hug after he hadn't seen me for a couple hours and I couldn't stop thinking about how sweet it was. Had to write a post). :)
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Traditional Roles
I struggle with my feelings about the "traditional" roles that we all fall into. I want to think I'm progressive, I've grown up with great role models and strong women to look up to. But, I still feel myself falling into the "mom guilt" area beyond just wanting to make sure everyone is happy and healthy.
How is it that I have turned into someone who needs to hear appreciation for meals? I sit and hold my breath while the DH and kids try it out until I hear the sounds of enjoyment. WTH? On the one hand, I feel that I should make something and they should eat it and everything is fine. But on the other hand....I need that feedback. And it kills me when DH says "it's fine" - I need more than fine. I need to hear if I should make it again, if it needs something more, if it's too spicy or too bland. BUT if he is too critical, I can't help but feel bad. UGH! For the most part, he's just happy to sit and eat in peace.
This worry extends beyond the kitchen. Am I the only mom who feels guilty when DH gives the boys their baths? I should ENJOY the fact that he will do it, instead of feeling guilty that he's doing it while I am tending to other things in the house.
Sometimes, I feel that I need to know TOO much information about what happens when I'm not here. If I happen to go to happy hour or wine club, when I get home, I drill DH about what the boys had for supper, if they were in good moods, how and when did they go to bed. Sure, I love to hear the cute funny stories too but I want details about how the night went. Why? Why can't I just trust that they were fed, happy and healthy and peacefully sleeping? I never question DH's parenting ability, but I *need* those details. I can tell that it irritates him but he still will indulge me and tell me. Sometimes I don't get enough details but I try to let it go.
Even with how households have advanced I think that a lot of moms still feel the need to take care of the household, while the husband goes out to work and brings home the bacon. How do you balance it out when you're ALSO going to work and bringing home that same bacon??
I've tried to get over the feeling that I've got to do it all and know it all. Do you know how hard it is to ask DH to make a dentist appointment for one of the boys? He has no problem doing it, but he needs to be asked. It doesn't register with him to just take care of it. So then in my mind, why don't I just take care of it myself?
I should just relax, lay off the worrying and enjoy my family and house. I should let DH do his thing and appreciate how awesomely we work together. I realize this. I do. But it's so easy to fall into the guilt. Grr.
How is it that I have turned into someone who needs to hear appreciation for meals? I sit and hold my breath while the DH and kids try it out until I hear the sounds of enjoyment. WTH? On the one hand, I feel that I should make something and they should eat it and everything is fine. But on the other hand....I need that feedback. And it kills me when DH says "it's fine" - I need more than fine. I need to hear if I should make it again, if it needs something more, if it's too spicy or too bland. BUT if he is too critical, I can't help but feel bad. UGH! For the most part, he's just happy to sit and eat in peace.
This worry extends beyond the kitchen. Am I the only mom who feels guilty when DH gives the boys their baths? I should ENJOY the fact that he will do it, instead of feeling guilty that he's doing it while I am tending to other things in the house.
Sometimes, I feel that I need to know TOO much information about what happens when I'm not here. If I happen to go to happy hour or wine club, when I get home, I drill DH about what the boys had for supper, if they were in good moods, how and when did they go to bed. Sure, I love to hear the cute funny stories too but I want details about how the night went. Why? Why can't I just trust that they were fed, happy and healthy and peacefully sleeping? I never question DH's parenting ability, but I *need* those details. I can tell that it irritates him but he still will indulge me and tell me. Sometimes I don't get enough details but I try to let it go.
Even with how households have advanced I think that a lot of moms still feel the need to take care of the household, while the husband goes out to work and brings home the bacon. How do you balance it out when you're ALSO going to work and bringing home that same bacon??
I've tried to get over the feeling that I've got to do it all and know it all. Do you know how hard it is to ask DH to make a dentist appointment for one of the boys? He has no problem doing it, but he needs to be asked. It doesn't register with him to just take care of it. So then in my mind, why don't I just take care of it myself?
I should just relax, lay off the worrying and enjoy my family and house. I should let DH do his thing and appreciate how awesomely we work together. I realize this. I do. But it's so easy to fall into the guilt. Grr.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
*dirty* little secret
So with DH's impending departure to far off lands, and the fact that three boys are insanely messy and I like to delegate...we've got help at our house.
In the form of a cleaning lady. She comes to our house every third week and cleans up our messes. And I L.O.V.E. her. Bathrooms - check! Kitchen - check! Floors - check! Check, check check! Yay!
It has been such a relief to know that someone will come and help me. And it has caused me to want to KEEP this place clean. Yes, there's the everyday messes still, but I've become a lot more organized knowing that she's coming.
I never thought I would have a cleaning lady. With that, I have no idea how my mom kept our house up, with working all day and three kids making messes. Though, I would prefer NEVER to hear "we don't need a dishwasher, that's why we had kids" again in my life. Just sayin.
But for less than a tank of gas, she shows up every three weeks and cleans top to bottom. Woo to the freaking hoo.
Jay-bird is downstairs and says to me "Someone vacuumed our house!" Yes, she sure did. So he asks "why do we have a cleaning lady?" and I just look at him and say that I just can't keep up. He nods sagely and looks me square in the eye. "Me either mom. Me either."
Ha! :)
*Mom, if you're reading this, I just want to let you know that YES, I did purposely keep this from you for months on end. It's been about 3 months now since she started and I can't go back now. How do you think the house was so clean for T's birthday? I mean really! I just didn't want to hear it from Dad for admitting this. That's all. But dang, it's nice to come home to a clean house. For less than a tank of gas on a mid-size vehicle. Seriously, wooo to the hooo. :) Ultimately, I blame Rikka for giving me her info and Travis for providing the excuse.
In the form of a cleaning lady. She comes to our house every third week and cleans up our messes. And I L.O.V.E. her. Bathrooms - check! Kitchen - check! Floors - check! Check, check check! Yay!
It has been such a relief to know that someone will come and help me. And it has caused me to want to KEEP this place clean. Yes, there's the everyday messes still, but I've become a lot more organized knowing that she's coming.
I never thought I would have a cleaning lady. With that, I have no idea how my mom kept our house up, with working all day and three kids making messes. Though, I would prefer NEVER to hear "we don't need a dishwasher, that's why we had kids" again in my life. Just sayin.
But for less than a tank of gas, she shows up every three weeks and cleans top to bottom. Woo to the freaking hoo.
Jay-bird is downstairs and says to me "Someone vacuumed our house!" Yes, she sure did. So he asks "why do we have a cleaning lady?" and I just look at him and say that I just can't keep up. He nods sagely and looks me square in the eye. "Me either mom. Me either."
Ha! :)
*Mom, if you're reading this, I just want to let you know that YES, I did purposely keep this from you for months on end. It's been about 3 months now since she started and I can't go back now. How do you think the house was so clean for T's birthday? I mean really! I just didn't want to hear it from Dad for admitting this. That's all. But dang, it's nice to come home to a clean house. For less than a tank of gas on a mid-size vehicle. Seriously, wooo to the hooo. :) Ultimately, I blame Rikka for giving me her info and Travis for providing the excuse.
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